My darling children

I have been thinking recently about my hopes for my children. I know their lives are going to be difficult and that the world is not a friendly place a lot of the time. I know that I will be to blame for much of their issues as they grow up but I work hard every day to ensure that I am kind and gentle with my words and actions so as to do as little damage as possible. I will help them work through their issues as best I can and will buy them professional help to undo the crap I have bestowed on them too.

I know that I am unconventional. I know that not everyone agrees on how I parent but I do what I do with an openness and awareness. The decisions I make are well informed and deliberate. I take being a mother very seriously. My children are my priority, my number one concern and they occupy my mind every minute of every hour I am awake.

So, to my darling children,

Life is a cunt. Learn the rules so you can break them without getting caught.  Acquire the skills that will let you play the games to get through as unscathed as possible. I am not good at this. I will introduce you to people that are when the time is right and you are ready.

I hope you have awesome sex. I hope you don't feel guilty about it and that you and your partner can enjoy your body (safely though!). Have as many partners as you want but remember that hearts get easily broken or damaged when sex is concerned. Protect yours and be gentle with the hearts of others. Be respectful of your sexual partners and yourself. Experiment safely.

Have fun. People like being around happiness. Jump, dance, run, play, get messy, jump in puddles, kiss in the rain. Be wild. Enjoy every moment. There is fun to be found all over the place and in some of the most mundane activities. Know the boundaries though, there are times when it is important that you are serious. Funerals are not the place for jokes.

Do what you want. Follow your heart and live your own life. Be independent. Find what matters to you and don't let anyone get between you and those values.

Dress well. Wear good shoes. Invest in quality sunglasses. You are more than what you wear but people judge all the time. Be aware that your fashion choices dictate your personal style.

Be honest. Say what you mean and mean what you say. If you have nothing nice to say, don't say it at all. Issue compliments when you mean them, not out of obligation.

Remember your manners. Politeness is underrated and always appreciated. Reply to invitations. Be on time to appointments. Never be late to a wedding. Wear modest clothing to a funeral; a mini is never appropriate (especially for guys). Say please and thank you (and mean it). Open the door for others. Wait for all meals to be served at a restaurant before starting on your own dish.

Give generously and do so without thought of what you are going to get in return. Be kind and considerate but don't get ripped off in doing so. Give because you want to not because others demand it of you.

Love deeply. Be passionate and spontaneous. Kiss frequently, hug often and never leave in the middle of an argument. Your heart will, no doubt, get broken. I will help you to recover from that. Don't let the risk of heartache prevent you from falling madly in love and giving it everything you have.

Read. You cannot be expected to know it all. Rely on those that have been there before to help you out. Don't believe everything you read though. Take what you know and apply it in every situation. Research but don't let books get in the way of you experiencing real life.

Know that I will always be on your side. Regardless of what you do I will stick by you. I will support and encourage you but I will expect you to take responsibility for your actions.

I love you both, Mum