Fairy tales

I postulate that our society is fundamentally flawed.  Our children are exposed to stereotypes and the glorification of life from birth.  Ergo they cannot possibly expect to grow up balanced and mentally stable.   Our daughters are fed fairy tales of beautiful women being swept off their feet by gorgeous princes who deliver flowers, ride horses and protect them from the evils in life.  Our sons are led to believe that they can fight anyone that crosses them (and win).  They are imbibed with images of muscled men with chiseled jaws and unparalleled ninja skills; exceptionally coordinated, brave and indestructible.

And the truth is that the Disney version of the fairy tales that are intravenously fed to our children are not an accurate reflection of the original stories.  In the original story Snow White was forced to put on red hot shoes and dance until she died; Pinnochio was hanged for his lies; the princess did not kiss the frog to turn him back to a prince but threw him against a wall; Hansel and Gretel's parents abandon them because they are too poor to feed them and the French version of Sleeping Beauty sees the prince rape her while she is in a coma.

It's no wonder there are so many people with skewed ideas of life; of how to treat others and what to expect in their future.  There are so many people that treat others terribly. And, they consistently get away with it.  Moreover, people actively chase these personality types; seeking their approval, desperate to spend time with them.  It perplexes me.  I find it morbidly fascinating.


I think that's one of the reasons I love Brave so much.  Merida is not the classic princess.  She is a skilled archer with wild hair and zero table manners.  I love that she fights for her freedom and does not end up marrying the prince.

I plan on teaching my children differently; passing on the life skills that I am learning currently as they grow up.  Life is not perfect.  Far from it in fact.  I have realised that we need to be equipping our children with the ability to be self sufficient (read self confident).  Rather than protecting them from the evils and complexities of life, we need to be teaching them the skills they will need to cope with the inevitable ups and downs that will come their way.  

Our daughters (for the most part) will not become princesses.  Likewise, our sons will not be parkour masters.  They need to realise, and learn to cope with, the fact that the world is a tough and indiscriminate place.  Moreover, I need to learn and accept that before I can pass that wisdom onto my children and equip them with the skills to get through life less scarred than I am.  

Like many others, I was fed the fairy tales.  I was led to believe that my life would work out okay; that everyone gets the happy ending; that I would be loved and cherished.  The truth is otherwise.  However, because of my ingrained way of thinking, I can not cope with nor accept the fact that I am unlovable regardless of how much I need to.  I am thirty six years old and I need to re-learn all the fundamental truths I once took as fact.  

Despite my name, I am actually not lovable.  Nor am I worthy of love.  I am not perfect, nor will I ever achieve perfection regardless of how hard I try.  I am not going to be exceptional at anything.  I, like 99.99% of the population am nothing special.  I am not unique.  I am  Acceptance will take a long time but hopefully it will bring peace.