Giving thanks

I have been pondering for a long time about issuing thank yous to the people in my life that have had an influence on  me.  I imagine that people are mostly unaware of the influence their actions have on other people.  I am flattered when someone tells me that I had an influence on their life, whether it be the smallest insignificant thing or something pretty major.  Therefore, I am going to make a start on that quest.

There are, of course, the obvious ones.  My Mum, Dad and sister are all fucking awesome; each in their own way.  Mum pushes my boundaries, always expecting more from me and encouraging me to do better.  Dad silently sits on the sidelines, providing pearls of wisdom intermittently.  My sister is the most spectacular woman I know.  She is strong and unrelenting.  She has a plan and will execute it to perfection.  She makes things work for her and plays the game like a pro.  I envy her but I know I will never be like her.  We are too different for me to be like her.  She finds that really hard to understand at times; I have a greater ability to grasp and embrace our differences.

Then there's my extended family.  I have brilliant cousins and my aunt has been through similar life experiences and is able to share them with me and provide some insight from someone on the other side.  There are also lifelong friends who are always there at the drop of a hat to listen to me wallow in my shit and provide me with a cup of tea.

I have been astounded at people's generosity in the last year. For example, my sister put together a beautiful sticker montage for me as a housewarming present.  I treasure it.  For Christmas, I received three gifts that made my day.  My cousin's girlfriend gave me an inspirational poster that I plan to frame and hang in my kitchen when I can afford it.  My cousin gave me a book entitled "Yes, you can" full of inspirational quotes.  My other cousin gave me some cool "it's raining men" body wash that makes me smile each and every time I use it (and I use it sparingly so it can stay in my shower a little longer).  

Then I think about other influential people.  Like sexy man number one, who I have mentioned previously, who encouraged me to run and showed me that I was strong enough to build up endurance, regardless of my starting point and that it did not matter how fast or far I ran as long as I enjoyed it.  He taught me the beauty of the endorphin rush that only comes from running.

Then, the number one influence in my life, the best friend I have ever had.  He is awesome - smart, funny, charismatic, personable and incredibly talented.  He taught me so many things in life and about myself.  He was the first person outside my family to tell me that it's okay to be sensitive; that it's not necessarily a flaw but something to be nurtured. I had always imagined that we would travel the world together.  Alas, the world had other plans and it never happened.  This man is the ultimate gentleman.  He showed me how important friendship can be and stood by me regardless of what happened.  He always knows exactly what to say and is a font of wisdom.  He has exceptional taste but still tolerated my love for pop music.  He is adored by women and admired by other men.  He has a plethora of friends and is attentive to his large family.  He has his shit sorted and priorities set right.  He is the first person that tried to teach me that I was enough.  Just me.  Unfortunately, I was too young and naive to see.  I will, however, be thankful for the foundation he laid for me.  I return to it often.  It is my rock when the sea is washing over me, trying to draw me away from the shore.

For me, he will forever be my knight in shining armour.  I love him more deeply (in a non-romantic way) than I have ever loved anyone outside my family.  He' saw my shit and liked me anyway.  He was under no obligation to do so but chose that.  It gives me faith that, considering there are another three or so billion men out there, someone else might be able to do so too.