I will not apologise

I have high standards.  Mainly of myself but sometimes for the people around me. I am fussy when it comes to food, I try to dress well and I will not stoop in the way I conduct myself to suit others. I choose to live in a way that makes me proud of the person I am today.

I have been told that I am impossible. Perhaps this is true. But I am who I am and I will change for no one. I have taken that path before and it has not served me well. So, like the most divine Ms Monroe says "I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best".

I have made choices in the past that I am not proud of. I have been ashamed of myself for many years. I am now taking steps to move forward from that and I will let go of even the most awesome of people if they drag me down. I will never again let someone stand in my way. I am not bitchy about it.  Quite the contrary, I am thoughtful and considerate to a fault. But I come first now. I will not lower my standards to accommodate others. I would rather go without than settle for second best. 

I know that this means that I will go without a lot of things. I know that I will forgo immediate satisfaction for long term gain. I refuse, however, to look back at my life in a decade and be disappointed. I choose not to apologise for my high standards for those who really want to be in my life will rise to the challenge. They will step up to meet me and it will be worth their while to do so.  

I choose to surround myself with people that bring out the best in me; with people that make me think and who push me beyond my current boundaries to achieve greater things.