Ten minutes

I have ten minutes 'spare' between commitments so I am choosing to lie still and contemplate. Just think about the pressures in my life and how I feel about them; the way I respond to them and my vices (I mean coping mechanisms). In these ten minutes I heave my chest with effort for every breath hurts. My eyes are burning, constantly on the verge of tears and my body aches with the pain of sleeplessness and worry. For what? For a hint of a man. For the possibility of a chance at happiness with the one I adore. Ha! What a fucking waste of energy and emotion.

In my ten minutes I have initiated a mind shift. May the winds of change start and blow away the funk of the last six weeks of misery and uncertainty. May they push through every crack in the wall and take with them the fear and pain. Let the heartache and sorrow go. Cleansing and swift.